clouds

clouds

i spent the entire afternoon at KUart today. in between conversations on arts and physics, we sipped tea and i gazed into the landscape stretched before me.

january 2009: that was the first time i had visited KUart. i was in my fourth year in college. i remember sujan dai pointing out a house to me. a house that he liked; the design of it. i asked him where the house was today because i couldn’t find it. well, more than a dozen new houses have propped up behind the KUart complex now, that the beautiful house can barely be spotted. we talked of dreams and of recurring dreams and of remembering dreams. we talked of clouds, of stars…i didn’t know that some of stars we’re seeing are some billion years old…their light reached the earth only then. they may not be there tomorrow. we talked of light and of time..of dimensions and electromagnetic waves…

i walked back home looking at the clouds and admiring them. really, the clouds in kathmandu are something. then rewinding the afternoon’s conversation, i felt small looking at the clouds. i am a dot in kathmandu…i am probably a trillionth of a fraction of a speck in the universe and even smaller than that. ah, the purpose of my existence…what is it?

after a very long time (years), i made a self-portrait today….