Today, as I was stepping out of the Academy’s building, I came across a candle and flowers in the lobby. They weren’t there when I had come in, in the morning. And a book open with condolence messages. I had never spoken to this person, even though I knew he was a teacher here. I had never been in his class and yet, I always remembered him smiling as he walked across the halls and steps.
It always feels numbing to know about someone’s death – be it close or far. Since I got here in Gothenburg last September, three people in the Academy where I study have passed away. At home, my baje and a little boy my family knew passed away.
Summer is here in the city. But even after all this waiting, I don’t feel particularly elated. Maybe it’s because it isn’t really hot as Kathmandu, which defines my standard of a summer! I mean, it’s hot for people here. But for me, I still have to carry a jacket in my bag. Then there’s the sun that sets after 10 pm and rises around 4 am! And I have a feeling that by the time my body adjusts to this crazy schedule, winter will have started rolling in. hah!
I wish I would do productive things instead of watching mindless CSI tv series online. Classes are over and it’s been tough to motivate myself to be productive. I go to the park to read but I instantly feel sleepy under the tree’s shade and soft breeze. I get distracted by the guided tours on the boats. I am tempted to buy a bag of chips and munch it all down. I have to consciously buy oranges instead. This is the first time I have lived on my own and I’ve realized how little things matter everyday. In Kathmandu, I never went grocery shopping – I mean tarkari shopping to be precise. haha. So the food choices I make on my own here are not quite healthy. I think the only vegetable I eat regularly are mushrooms…hahaha…does that even count?
I am a bit lazy sometimes.
I came across these plants in the park yesterday. I think it is the right moment to use the word ‘flabbergasted’ here. hahaha So I was ‘flabbergasted’ to see how precisely they were arranged inside fake gigantic metal ‘flowers’. I thought it was insane! Then I began to wonder, if I had ever seen these plants growing in their natural habitats. NO, of course not. I wish I could seen them in the middle of somewhere, growing wherever they’d wanted to be. This whole artificial arrangement made me feel really uneasy. Like they were being confined into this ridiculous shape of a flower! I mean, can’t you just let them be?????
an afterthought: maybe it’s because i don’t like artificial plants. i really really don’t. and this basically is the worst I’ve ever seen.