this better be the last time i tell this story. and if anyone asks me, i will refer them to this post.
so i was at maitighar the other day. sunday, to be specific. i was going to meet a pal, KC 1 at jawlakhel at 4:30 pm. so i hop on the tempo at maitighar and sit at the end..hawa khanu lagi. and there is this old granny with short white hair (‘punk’ as my friend KC1 put in later) sitting inside and this other lady sitting opposite to me. and then she pokes at my leg..sunana…bahini
and i say, hajur?
and then she reveals the khatra story that i will now narrate:
the grandma is 76 years old and she got on the tempo at babarmahal. she was supposed to go to a wedding party and so she got ready and all that jazz. malai asti lagayeko ko sari nalaga bhaneka, tini haru le. ma ta bahira niske ko ta…na agadi na pachadi. the gist of the story: her family forgot her/left her at home when they were leaving for the party.
grandma has no money with her. tyaha euta pasal ma gayera pachas rupiya mage…aparadhi aparadhi ma budhi lai chodera gayeee.
the other lady says: tapaika chori bhako bhaye tapailai dukha hudaina thiyo ni…am confused here…and so she elaborates: waha ko teen chora teen chori chan…teen chori bitisake.
and am like OHHH!! so far so good, i am only listening to the story. and then comes the main part.
malai tyaha jawlakhel ma indreni party palace ma cha party bhanya thiyo. tyo thau sinamangal bata najik cha re ..says grandma. nani lai thaha cha??? she’s looking at meee!!!
hmmm..so i dial up KC1 and my ama and find out that there’s no Indreni party palace at Jawlakhel. by this time we are already past kupondole and heading up the slope of pulchowk. and grandma wants to get off at Jawlakehl. i ask the other folks in the tempo if they knew a Indreni party palace in Jawlakhel..some turn a deaf ear and some say nope.
now, the other lady gets off at damkal and i am left to help grandma on my own. so i decide that i will help her until KC1 arrives..she’s usually late anyways.
we get off at jawlakhel and thus the ADVENTURE BEGINS! i pay for her fare too. coz she’s saying…ma sanga dus rupiya chaaaa…AND GRANDMA NEEDS TO GO TO THE LOOO!!! my heads spinning now.
now with so many banks in kumaripatti i start with the one next to bakery cafe…i ask the security guard and tell him the entire story of how i met her in the tempo and how her family left her at home and that she’s looking for a indreni party palace….he says..nope not heard of any indreni party palace. in the meantime, grandma gets to go use the bank’s loo. what a relief!
the guard dai points us to one of the party palaces….across the road. we go over..it’s called bhhoe chen or sth like that. there are three guys in this room when i randomly barge in with grandma…i feel awkward coz they are relaxing…one is like lying down on the sofa and smoking and all…blah blah..but i had to ask them…and so i tell the whole story again..tempo, lost, indreni?????
NOPE, they don’t know.
we make a move from there and i get to thinking hard. i ask grandma…what is the name of the groom? and she says…mero mama ko chora ho…something with Pokharel as the last name. and her name is Krishna Maya i think. can’t remember for sure hai. and i think..if it is at one of the indreni’s locations…i can just find out if there’s any pokharel having a wedding party.
so i decide to make a call to Indreni party …coz i know there’s one in baneshwor..the big big one. i’ve read the story of the owner who started real small. anyways, so i call KC1 coz i keep forgetting the inquiry number..it’s 197 she says. i call and ask them for Indreni, baneshwor ko number.
thankfully, the indreni guy is helpful. he says he’ll call me back. so he called and said…yaha ta limbu ko pa party cha..ma pheri confirm garchu hai. during all this time, we were in front of that department store..across to hotbreads. grandma is sitting on the pavement. and he calls back again..and says sorry, no pokharels celebrating weddings anywhere.
now i am like trying to convince grandma…it’s past 5 pm. tapailai aba ma babarmahal jane tempo ma chadai dinchu la? and she’s like, ‘aba yetro aisake pani, mero mukh dekhaunu paryo ni aparadhi haru lai…aparadhi..aparadhi..aparadhi…thukkka…aparadhi…’ the whole time she’s calling her sons criminal…ma sanga char jana thiye..ani ajhai panch jana audain thiye…aparadhi..malai chodera gaye. sari pani pherna lagaye..arko chora ghar mai cha birami bhayeraa..
SHE WANTS TO GO TO ALL THE PARTY PALACES IN THE WHOLE DAMN STREET TO FIND HER SON AND RELATIVES!!!
abu chitta bujhaunu paryo ni hoina? she looks at me..and i say…aaaa..tyo ta hoooo…..
what happened next? we went to two other party palaces…crossing the road twice. euta ma ta poudel ko party re..arko ma ta party nai thiyena AND remember I REPEAT THE ENTIRE STORY AGAIN TO THESE PEOPLE AND TO SOME PASALES AND GUARD DAIS!
and then, it starts to rain like hell. and we got no umbrellas!!! i never carry one. and grandma well, she didn’t even have money…forget the umbrella. so i tell her, khasto tauko ma odnus. i am so desperate by this time and i am so confused about what to do. and am also scared that even if i put her in a tempo, whether she’ll get home or not. now it’s like 5:30 pm.
KC1 finally arrives! WHEW. and i tell her ‘i have a problem’. she sees a guy behind me and for some reason assumes that he’s been stalking me and therefore, the guy is my problem. but well, that was not it right. she finds out after i tell her the entire story….tempo, lost, family, blah blah blah blah….
but then, right when i met KC1 we had reached Citizen Bank and the guards there were obviously wondering why the heck on earth was i walking around in the crazy downpour with a grandma. and so tell them the story tooo…whewwwww….and they say…we’ll help, too!!! YIIIPPPIEEE!!! thank you Citizen Bank staff for saving the day…evening?
i leave grandma in good hands and i tell them, me and KC1 will go to one more party palace. this is my fourth one…and am not half way through kumaripatti kyaaa!! at the agni party palace..we find out that there is a bratabanda ko partayyy! and we repeat the story again there…uff..they sympathize but they can’t help.
KC1 and i decide to go back to the bank coz it’s almost 6 by now and it’s cold…brrr…am cold. i decide that i will go stay at her place in bhaisepati instead of trying to get home. we get back and WALLAH! the kind staff of citizen bank offered to take her back home in a bike. that was like a huge huge relief for me. so i would like to thank them here, for their generous offer. i was beginning to panic.
and so we bid goodbye to grandma in the bank and tell her to take care. and well, since then i have told the story again and again.
1) to ama on why i couldn’t come back home
2) to KC1’s brother and mom on why i suddenly decided to come and stay over, without my tooth brush.
3) to other folks whom i was interested to tell the story to…at first. aba ta pugi sakyo.
like a friend said…timile ta super duper item bhetechau!
grandma i hope you are fine and safe at home in anamnagar.