sometimes i eat bread because i want to eat butter. it’s like buying ice-cream because you want to eat the cone. or a cup of coffee because you want to sit by that corner window and watch people passing by. and sometimes, i put on my ear phones even though i’m not listening to anything, so that people don’t come and talk to me. this is especially effective when i’m studying at the library.
i have strange habits and i don’t like bread…as in the regular loaf of bread – be it white, or wheat or rye or whatever. i might like to eat toast sometimes but bread in general, i’ve eaten enough of it in my life…. it’s the boarding school food phobia! they make you dislike the vegetables you even once thought you liked or had the possibility of liking. for example, if you are given cauli ko tarkari for an entire winter how could you still keep liking it?
i guess rice is an exception here.
that reminds me of that funny daal bhat song that someone made and posted on youtube. what a crazy but lovely idea. hahaha. here’s the song. It’s called You Fill me Up – Dal Bhat. nice tribute to dal bhat. hahaha. hahahaha. on that note, here’s a funny picture of me. i definitely look like i’ve been eating a lot of dal bhat here in gothenburg too. which reminds me, i need to buy some daal.
i noticed some tiny little buds sprouting this morning, while i waited for the tram. i’ve been eagerly waiting for the spring but each time the sun comes up, it goes back into hiding. DAMN those clouds!
ahh. it’s so mundane and boring to write about the weather but that’s the only thing that seems to be on my mind. i’m inspired one day when the sun shines through my studio’s window for even an hour and the next day, i feel like falling flat on the bed all day. and my african violet plant is refusing to get better…it’s been dying on me. :-(
i have been reading about Jimmie Durham lately and his book ‘A certain lack of coherence’. i came across this particular sculpture by him today:
The text reads:
“At first I was shocked and angry,” said Tomio Kaiya, who makes and sells Dinosaur cookies, “I learned the news about the dinosaur only this morning when I read the newspaper…”
After a long time, I have come across an art work that compels me so strongly as Durham’s Footnote.
i feel like sitting in a train and going on a long journey with no purpose of reaching somewhere. just so that i can sit still under a blanket – not shift an inch – stare out the window yet move miles every hour. the view outside the window would be of infinite plains, and the sun would travel steadily across the sky. when it switches sides, i would switch seats so that i could watch it set.
it ought to be like the little prince who moves his chair to watch the sunset over and over again. Here’s the part of the book where he talks of sunsets. i have always loved this book.
“I am very fond of sunsets. Come, let us go look at a sunset now.”
“But we must wait,” I said.
“Wait? For what?”
“For the sunset. We must wait until it is time.”
At first you seemed to be very much surprised. And then you laughed to yourself. You said to me:
“I am always thinking that I am at home!”
Just so. Everybody knows that when it is noon in the United States the sun is setting over France.
If you could fly to France in one minute, you could go straight into the sunset, right from noon.
Unfortunately, France is too far away for that. But on your tiny planet, my little prince, all you
need do is move your chair a few steps. You can see the day end and the twilight falling whenever
“One day,” you said to me, “I saw the sunset forty-four times!”
And a little later you added: “You know, one loves the sunset, when one is so sad…” “Were you so
sad, then?” I asked, “on the day of the forty-four sunsets?”
But the little prince made no reply.
i had a weird day. i should rewrite that. i had a day that started well but ended up in panic mode! what level of panic mode? TITANIC levels!
first, i should mention that i have been working at a cafe since end of january here in gothenburg. it’s only a few hours a week but still studying and working is always challenging. and i need to work so that i can study and buy art materials. i had a cool job in college before…i will not talk about that here. and so, i was at the cafe today and my shift was over at 8 pm. i am the person who locks up everything and leaves. and so i was going around, packing things and locking fridges and doors….And theeeeennnnn….i locked myself out of the office with the office keys inside the office. ARGGHHH!!!
why does that even happen!
and this particular door that locked me out NEVER EVER EVER locked on its own before and today, right when i had left the keys inside, it decided to shut on my face. i was freaking out like hell…now, that was the ONLY key to the door and the only set of keys that opens all the fridges and the storage..i mean, without the key the cafe cannot run at all..and here i had gone and locked it up inside.
i called some people from the building….they tried to help me…but no, no, no, they didn’t have an extra key or a master key as such. i was jumping ahead in my mind and thinking of what would happen if they had to tear the damn door down. oh my goodness! and i had been working there only for a month and this fiasco wasn’t looking good at all… yikes!
so i just kept pushing the handle and kicking the door. and guess what! finally, the door gave up. it decided to budge and it unlocked on its own. WHAT a lousy door! :-P anyway, i think it was just messing up with me. but for a moment, it sent me into a very serious panic mode.
I am promising myself this from today: I WILL NEVER EVER EVER TAKE THE KEY INTO THE OFFICE. NEVER.
thank you for reading my boring/silly incident. anyone got a good ‘locked myself out’ story?
here’s sth i’ve been working on, in terms of my art practice. it is needle and thread on nepali paper.
i am thinking of the soft sigh of the PVTA bus from my college years. it let out this sigh…just like a person who had worked all day makes, after finally getting a moment to relax….it made this sound each time it stopped to open its doors. and it was this sigh that woke me up every morning when my room was near one of the bus stops. it would wake me up and make me rush out of bed for my 9 am class at another college. and to get there, i would have to take the same bus.
oh, how much i dreaded those bus rides!!! i couldn’t stand the smell of the bus’s interior. it was the air conditioning in the summer and the heating in the winter that both gave me headaches. as much as i loved the classes i was taking elsewhere, sometimes those bus rides sucked out my motivation. especially on those mornings, when i woke up to open the shades to two feet of snow.
in my third year of college, my room was in the basement and the snow would collect outside my window. ughh! it was a cold cold room where the radiator rattled and groaned all night, like it was having a really bad episode of diarrhea. it wasn’t until i said that i had to visit the health center because i couldn’t sleep that the FacMan came to fix it. and to add on to that, i ended up with a bed with such a bad spring that i removed the mattress and laid it out on the floor for the rest of the year. and that’s my situation right now too…here in gothenburg. the spring in the bed frame is my ultimate nightmare!!! not only did it squeak each time i turned to adjust myself, it also gave me terrible backaches. okay, i don’t know why but i feel like i’ve written about this before. :-P
so they’ve pulled down all the christmas decorations that were up for some three months i think. it was nice but i thought that the rows of colorful butterflies at the Avenyn were a little over done!:-P but well, they did serve their purpose of making me laugh every time i saw them walking along the street.